What's that green thing on my plate?!

My fridge is full, bursting at the...uh...hinges. This time of year is such a wonderful season of abundance. The variety of vegetables and fresh fruits in my crisper right now is overflowing and sending me scrambling to my recipe collection to find ways to cook, bake and preserve all this goodness before they go bad. 

That's where I run into a wall. I have a fussy eater. Anything green, leafy, or coming out of the earth is usually met with a great deal of resistance. Although we promised we would never do this, we find we've often prepared separate meals for our son from what we were eating. I have recently been inspired to completely rethink the way we present our mealtimes and approach food with our children.

At our most recent Healthy Baby SuperStart meeting in my hometown, the topic of discussion between the mothers present was food and what was the parent's responsibility and what was the child's responsibility. I learned a very simple and straight-forward approach to preparing and presenting meals for toddlers and young eaters. I thought I'd share what I learned.

Basically, there's a Golden "Rule" for feeding children:

You Decide:
-What food is served
Offer a variety of foods from each food group. What I've learned is that it's best to provide a selection that your child can choose from at the table. A lot of parents have a tendancy to "plate-up" their child's dish with what they want them to eat. By doing this though, we are taking away the child's desire to choose for themselves what they'd like to eat. As a result, their sense of independence is challenged and then they resist.
-When food is served
Make eating times pleasant. Food is to be enjoyed. Let your toddler be a messy eater and feed themselves. This is part of learning. Don't rush feeding. Children often take longer to eat than adults. Expect toddlers to stay at the table at least 10 minutes. Another thing to try and avoid is allowing your child to 'graze'. Try to avoid giving children food or drink at least an hour before mealtimes so that they actually have an appetite and learn to eat at structured mealtimes.

Children Decide:
-Whether to eat
Saying "no" to food is a way of showing independence. Occasionally, it is OK for a child not to eat a meal or snack. Never force a child to eat, or punish a child for not eating. I know this is hard, but try not to use dessert as a bribe to eat the rest of the meal. This will only solidify the child's feelings of the meal being an ordeal to get through in order to achieve the prize of something sweet, instead of instilling a genuine love of the meal itself. 
-How much to eat 
Let toddlers develop their own sense of when they are 'done' or full. At times, children will be hungry and eat a lot. Other times they won't eat very much. Keep their portions small and don't pressure a child to "finish your drink" or "clean your plate". Just remove uneaten food without comment.


-Taken from "Feeding Your Toddler with Love and Good Food" -British Columbia Ministry for Children and Families.

After letting these concepts sink in a bit, I've realized that I don't need to fret so much about whether my children are getting the proper nutrition they need and I don't need to prepare foods to cater to specific palettes. The approach is simple. Make food the way I normally would, as long as there is variety to choose from. If there's something in a dish that my child doesn't like, he can pick it out. That's fine. Eventually, after being exposed to it repeatedly and seeing us eat and enjoy the foods we prepare, I have to trust that he'll want to try it himself. I have to remember that if my children see me stressing out over their food consumption, they'll see it as a negative experience and naturally want to avoid it. I hope you've found this information helpful if you have a fussy eater in your home.